Wary Wonderlust

Making Wonder, Working on the Wary

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Category: Religion

How to Keep Your Wonder

November 9, 2019

To keep your wonder, in spite of personal circumstance and even when the world feels like one big dumpster fire, you must find a practice that gives you the freedom to choose what matters and commit yourself to it. … More How to Keep Your Wonder

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Across from my usual gas station, there used to be a patch of forest. I enjoyed seeing the trees against the sky, being able to ignore the blank bricks and rusted edges of the buildings around the tiny wood. But now almost all of them have been ripped away. The inconvenient roots and branches disposed of in favor of something else. Maybe a restaurant I’ll be excited about. Or maybe just another gas station. Today, I mourn the trees with their oxygen and the sacred skyline that allowed me to pause and breathe and sway with the wind even as I inhaled toxic fumes from long dead plants we pumped from their graves to power our movement. Today, I’m a sad hypocrite. But then, that’s every day. #environment #trees

The first days of January bring thoughts of remembrance and fresh starts. But there’s also a bareness. The house seems bigger when the tree comes down. Emptier. I never find a calendar before the new year begins, so I take the old one down, leaving a blank space on the wall like time itself has been sucked into a void, gone forever, our lives frozen between moments momentous and monotonous. Blank space to breathe. To think. To gather. The pause before an inhale. The intention before the act. The calendar moves regardless and I will find a new collection of paper to hang, bringing with it the days that will come and all the moments we get to bear. #January #newyear #time

I love Monet’s Haystacks. So much so, I recently talked about why I love them on the Art Class Curator Podcast. Thinking about the artwork inspired me to take more outdoor walks—not as exercise, but as a time to focus on the wonders of nature and the diverse lives being lived in nature. Each time, I notice something wondrous and move indoors feeling more at peace and focused. Today, I realized that in my mind I’ve always imagined all squirrels as connected, like they have a massive network where they chat about the best places to find acorns, which birds are the noisiest in the morning, and the odd behavior of humans. I wonder what I’ll discover next time. #wonderlust #nature #art

I grew up without holidays. To a certain extent, I still feel like an imposter, even after all these years of making holidays happen for my family. But something happened as we put up the tree this year. My son managed to reach every branch and helped me unfurl many of them. It was like he grew several inches in front of my eyes. My daughter joked about the terrible ornaments she picked when she was younger, then said she was the only one allowed to hang them. As I made a list of all we needed to watch and eat and do, I saw just how much we built our own holiday, our own traditions, our own joy and delight. I look at the new trees, the ones that unfurl automatically and are already lit and think, “Ah, that’d be so easy and convenient.” And it would. But we’ve lived our lives in a dozen different apartments. We have no door jam marked with our children’s rising heights. But we have this tree and the pictures of them growing taller next to it in new jammies year after year. Their arms can reach the top now, the ornaments are not clustered front and center and only halfway up. It makes my heart happy. May your days and your traditions be as merry and bright as mine. #wonderlust #merryandbright #christmastree

Evan!

Pretty and delicious.

Vote! At every opportunity. #vote

I’ve never had a hard time saying “I love you” to other people. After growing up in a house where it wasn’t said often, my mother made a point to say it freely. I saw the way it made her siblings uncomfortable until they grew used to it. Now, I say it to friends and family without restraint. I’ve seen that same uncomfortable look on the faces of others, those not used to hearing that they are loved and worthy of that love. I did not think I would ever be the person whose face twists to hear the words, but I was wrong. During a yoga practice, I was instructed to whisper “I love you” to myself. It felt a little silly, but I was in a safe space. I whispered. Despite being well-versed in self-care, self-love, and having said “I love me” unironically, this was something different. Those three little words I’ve shared so willingly with others have never been turned toward myself. Tears poured immediately. Do I love myself? What does it mean to love myself? Am I acting with love toward myself? More and more, I am. But hearing the words from my own lips mattered—for the parts of me that believe it and the parts of me that don’t. So, whisper “I love you” to yourself. Maybe one day we’ll be able to shout it. #selfcare #selflove #loveyourself #wonder #wonderlust

Seat upgrade! #GoStars

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